As I was sitting in church one Sunday morning, I noticed a compelling observation which prompted me to question, why are so many black mothers single? Why are so many black women single? Unmarried? A few aren’t even knocking on the marriage door, but most are, if he were the right one.
Single by Choice?
Black women are their own persons; they are independent and self-sufficient; they are strong and can do almost anything a man can. But…black women need and want life partners too. Someone to have quiet conversations with in the middle of the night; someone to mow the lawn; to go down into a dark damp and musty basement or up into a creepy attic. Someone who is not like her, but a part of her all the same.
Yes, sister-girls are nice and a heart-to-heart with God is even better. In church, when the presence of the Holy Ghost comes down, in, and through…ain’t nothing like it! But when she walks through the door of her town home, condo, tri-level mansion, or two bedroom rental she wishes for a moment, a size 12 ½ pair of shoes were walking through the door with her.
The “Single” Status of Black Women
There are real conversations going on about singleness and the unmarried status of too many black women. Seventy percent of black women are not married. Seventy-two percent of black females are single moms. One of the overriding factors contributing to this phenomenon is too many young black males serving time in prison. In Chicago alone, eighty-percent of black males carry the weight of a felony on their record. This is a costly blow, even if one has paid his debt to society, it means finding work and supporting a family is significantly compromised.
Unfortunately, for black women, black men available for marriage have a pool of various ethnicities to choose from. The landscape is very competitive. Smith, a relationship and dating expert list several reasons why black women don’t make it to the wedding chapel.
- Black male shortage
- Black women are too angry, abrasive, and brash
- Some have weighed their options and made conscious decisions to remain single
- Black men don’t marry the attributes nor images of their mothers in the women they date, whereas other ethnicities do.
- Women are pursuing careers and waiting until they are too old to seriously pursue a marriage partner.
3 thoughts on “Black Women: Unmarried, Not By Choice”
Biggest thing I disagree with in your presentation , is the need for black women to go outside of their race, I feel first ,black women should not be looking for any man and should pray for God to send them a man that is God fearing with the ability to love God first, then himself, therefore loving his woman and others will not be a problem for him. Remember in God’s word, the Lord said, A man that finds a wife finds a good thing, not a woman that finds a man. So women please stop looking and steady yourself with the mission God has assigned for you to do.
Thank you for reading the article. I am grateful that each of us are uniquely made. It’s not that black women need to go outside their race, but they certainly have the option to do so if they want to. Amen and thanks so much for responding. I love it!
Be blessed Brenda.
I AM LOOKING FOR ARTICLE ABOUT WOMEN WHO DESIRE RESPECT IN THE HOME, PUBLIC AND WORKPLACE.
Comments are closed.